Cruise vacation - what was I thinking?

lt seemed like such a good idea at the time. As I boarded the giant cruise ship with my family, a variety of motion sickness aids packed in my suitcase, I hoped that all my research on the ship’s stability had been right and that I would be ok. I haven’t had a major flare up in almost a year and I was pretty confident I could handle it.

What many of you don’t know about me is that, in addition to my autoimmune disease, I also struggle with chronic vestibular migraines. What this means is that my brain gets overstimulated very easily with too much sensory input. It simply cannot reconcile contradicting visual and motion information and I get dizzy and lightheaded. Once this flare up is triggered, it usually takes anywhere between 3 days and 3 weeks to get back to my normal.

Things started off pretty well - I had some whispers of a headache but nothing I couldn’t handle. Then, on day 4, as the ship was crossing the sea between France and Spain, it encountered very rough waters and high winds. I felt it as soon as the ship started moving and it went from bad to worse very quickly. I spent several hours on the floor of our cabin bathroom as the ship rocked and swayed all around me. Completely exhausted, I crawled to my bed and fell asleep sitting up, hoping that morning would bring some relief. It did not - the ship’s rocking had triggered another flare up and I felt worse than ever. After two more days of complete misery, I asked my husband to book me on the first flight out and got off the ship. 

What is the point of my story and the lesson learned, might you ask? Well, it is this - KNOW YOUR BODY. Know that it is capable of great many things but also know its limitations. Establish clear boundaries around what YOU need to feel your best and stick to them. And finally, if you find yourself in a sticky situation - ask for help and take time to recover, whatever that looks like for you. For me, it is really cutting down on sensory noise my brain can’t process, no added sugar, alcohol and caffeine and lots of sleep. 

A healing journey is just that - a journey, not a destination, with many ups and downs along the way. The setbacks are painful, but it really helps to know how to get back on track, and this comes from listening to your body and giving it what it needs at times like these. 

I’ve never been good at this solo traveler thing, but here I find myself unexpectedly on my own in a foreign country for a few days, while my family is making their way to me on the monster cruise ship. I am exploring the city and its beautiful culture, but also just resting in my solitary cool hotel room, firmly on land.